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An Open Letter to Fellow CrossFitting Moms

January 13, 2017

11043111_10205185730577023_7600116868746802501_nPost Submitted by Strong Momma Ashley

I love the people I have met through CrossFit. They are my best friends- we drive our significant others nuts with our constant group chat about diets, fitness, and general savagery towards people on social media. I am the only one in the group, however, married with a child and trying for more. Although my friends support me and I support them, they are not ready for that part of their lives yet, and it therefore differentiates me from them as I take a step back from competing, and they still have the drive to keep pushing forward. It’s not a secret that it’s been an internal struggle for me over the years to take the time to train after work and keep up with my best friends when I have been away from my child all day. The other day I was talking to some fellow moms at the gym- one who went to CrossFit Regionals as an individual, but after almost two years and three kids later, has lost a lot of her strength and has just returned to work on img_8148getting it back; and one who was there with her college-aged daughter working on benching just more than the bar. As I was driving home, in between the constant, “Mom?” “Yes, Charlie” … can’t think of something to say pause…“I love you” “I love you too, peanut” from the back seat; I reflected on my conversations, goals moving forward, and the positivity they shared about my situation (struggling to stay competitive while working full-time and having a four year-old, having a still birth and moving on from that, etc). I was thinking it’s funny the cliches of classes at the box- although both groups train together daily and push each other, the 5 and 6pm *usually* has the most “competitive athletes”- the ones that have that drive it takes to compete at a high level, do mobility, train for hours, etc…and then 9am CrossFit class- typically known as the “mom class.” It’s almost entirely women, a lot bring their children with them and therefore will be in and out within the hour. Most of my friends are at the later evening classes, but the “mom class” is one of my favorite groups to train with, they are so positive and inspirational even if they are not at the top of the leader board- so I wanted to write an open letter to them- my fellow CrossFitting moms.

Dear CrossFitting Mom,

You impress me. You are amazing. You are strong as hell even if you are not labeled “strong” by img_0377weightlifting standards…even if you don’t like working out necessarily… I am still talking to you! There are so many easier things you could have chosen for fitness, but you come into the gym and challenge yourself to do more pull-ups, run harder, lift heavier…seriously, how many other moms do you know that weight lift at all? I know how hard it is for you to make it to the gym some days. Sometimes its been a long night and sometimes it’s already been a long day at 9am. I know how frustrating it is when your child is being a little shit after you got them and you ready, drove all the way to the gym and you need just 30 f-ing minutes of time to warm-up, do a workout, and put your stuff away. I get it, I’ve been there. It’s not always easy, but that’s what makes you more impressive.

fullsizerender-3-1I know it can be frustrating. It has probably happened that you have lost some strength or endurance or skill you worked so hard to get. Maybe you had another child and pregnancy took its toll so you selflessly had to begin again. Maybe life got busy or someone got sick and you had to take more days off than you wanted. Maybe you want to be as good as you know you can be, but you can’t justify the hours it takes to train with the guilt of not seeing your family. You want to stay another hour and work on weaknesses, but someone at home or in the locker room needs you. I understand. I have (and I hate to admit it) cried after workouts at the gym because, despite my best effort, I’m frustrated that I didn’t preform the way I expected myself to, especially after all it took to make it to the gym. 

I know it’s sometimes hard to come train in a place where people are running around with their asses hanging out in just shorts and a sports bra and your body holds the markings of carrying a child. Maybe you don’t look like you used to, maybe you are dying to take your shirt off or wear shorts, but you’re embarrassed, I understand. I have changed my clothes before the gym and kept my shirt on even when I am sweating profusely… but one day I truly hope you say to hell with it, I am 30 or 40-whatever years old and I look the way I look and I’m proud of what it took to get here, therefore I’m going to workout in whatever I feel comfortable in!image-7

You might not be at the top of the leader board… like ever… you might PR your snatch at a weight someone else just power cleaned… for reps… but I want you to know that I get you, I am so proud of you. You who may scale the workout, who doesn’t cheat reps just for a better score, you who cheers on everyone, looking like a hotmess, rushing in and out carrying a kid(s) without a warm-up/cool down/moment to stretch. YOU are my inspiration. Keep on pushing yourself momma… you know those little eyes are watching! (because you see them mimicking what they see in the gym making it all worth it. 🙂 XOXO

A fellow CrossFitting Mom

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  • Flerida ruppert January 14, 2017 at 3:23 pm

    I cried! Thank you for this

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:06 pm

      You are welcome! Keep smiling!

  • Jacid soto January 14, 2017 at 3:58 pm

    I love your letter, it means so much to me specially because I’m a mom and a full time job a husband a house and trying my very best to get my workout in every night , crossfit wast New choice of working out and I love it but I also know how hard it is to get there every night, I’m exhausted and sometimes I just want to go to sleep. Thank you for this letter now I know I must be a superwoman to do so much everyday.

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:06 pm

      Hats off to your supermom! It’s a tough job but we moms are strong! If you are ever in need of an inspiring group of moms who “get it” feel free to join our Private Facebook group! Get inspired, share your accomplishments (as well as your struggles) and know that an awesome group of moms have your back! https://www.facebook.com/groups/158745054500780/

  • Alexis January 14, 2017 at 6:23 pm

    Thank you for that.. It’s a great community and everyone supports everyone.. Keep strong Mamas you are doing an amazing job..

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:04 pm

      Thank you Alexis!

  • Jackie January 14, 2017 at 9:30 pm

    I’m sure you are getting more comments than you can read about this, but I wanted to thank you. You have literally put into words exactly how I feel – from the pride in my fellow crossfitting moms, to the frustration that brings on tears because I can no longer keep up with people I know I should be able to. I wouldn’t trade my twin four year olds for anything, but letting go of my competitive crossfitting self has been a struggle. It’s nice to know that I’m not alone. Maybe someday they will have a crossfit moms division in the open/at the games? 😉

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:03 pm

      A Crossfit moms division would be awesome, wouldn’t it? Great idea! We should all email in and recommend it – start a petition 😉 If you are having a rough day and need a place to vent or get support and encouragement feel free to join our Private Facebook group! We have tons of Crossfitting moms in that group!https://www.facebook.com/groups/158745054500780/

  • Monique January 14, 2017 at 10:33 pm

    Love it! Thank you for the awesome acknowledgement!

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:02 pm

      All moms needed to hear this message! You are welcome!

  • SUNDAY YOGA & OPEN GYM | CrossFit TakeOver January 14, 2017 at 10:49 pm

    […] An Open Letter to Fellow CrossFitting Moms […]

  • Anna January 15, 2017 at 1:56 am

    This is an amazing message. I am a crossfitting mum…. a regular, non competing crossfitting mum but I love it and I love the other crossfitting mums (and non mums) I be met on my short journey (6m).

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 8:01 pm

      Congrats on your decision to make Crossfit a part of your life! Crossfit Mom unite 🙂

  • Bella Olivia January 15, 2017 at 8:51 am

    Bawling my eyes out. Thank you!!!! I needed this!

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 7:59 pm

      It’s always encouraging to hear other moms talk about things you are going though, right? It’s like, you are not alone! If you are looking for more encouragement, support, or just a place get motivated and inspired feel free to join our private Fit Mom Strong Mom Facebook group – just a group of moms who “get it”
      https://www.facebook.com/groups/158745054500780/

  • Lem January 15, 2017 at 9:54 am

    I never lost my passion about Crossfit but my husband doesn’t support me doing it due to cost ($185/mo) and time. Aside from being expensive, he complains that I get home too late when I go workout. My kids are still grade schoolers and needs help with homework, dinner, etc… so getting home late after a WOD means going home in an unpleasant environment ending in a fight. So I stop going to the gym. It’s an ugly truth which he would never admit because he is never wrong and he is always right!

    • fitnessjenn2 January 15, 2017 at 7:56 pm

      I’m sorry to hear that Lem – Please know that our community is all about supporting moms and their passions for fitness. If you ever need a place to go to vent, get encouragement, support, etc please know you can get that here in our Private Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/158745054500780/
      Or our public page: http://www.facebook.com/fitmomstrongmom

    • Carolyn Strohl January 17, 2017 at 11:02 am

      Similar situation so I started collecting equipment in my garage, wake up before the family and get it done before anyone can complain I’m not meeting demands. Maybe it won’t be that way some day, but that’s the reality today.

  • Lori Buszkiewicz January 18, 2017 at 7:11 am

    Thanks so much for this! This is me! I totally related to everything you wrote. Busy working mom of 4 daughters here- the struggle is all too real.But I like to think I’m showing them balance when I leave home to go to the gym!! Just asked to join your FB group.

    • fitnessjenn2 January 19, 2017 at 10:13 am

      Awesome! Welcome to the group! I think you will enjoy our group of moms! We are all pretty bad-ass 😉

  • Ashley January 19, 2017 at 1:53 pm

    Thanks everyone! When I wrote this I had no idea it would resonate with so many. I don’t think anyone understands the toll it takes mentally and physically to try and me a mom and spend time on such a physical activity regardless of if you work in or out of the home (which is why I didn’t even bring that up!) If you ever want to look me up on instagram or facebook I would love to interact with all of you!

  • ashleylynn4786 January 19, 2017 at 1:54 pm

    Thanks everyone! When I wrote this I had no idea it would resonate with so many. I don’t think anyone understands the toll it takes mentally and physically to try and me a mom and spend time on such a physical activity regardless of if you work in or out of the home (which is why I didn’t even bring that up!) If you ever want to look me up on instagram or facebook I would love to interact with all of you!

    • ashleylynn4786 January 19, 2017 at 1:55 pm

      sorry: momasrx.blogspot.com or MomAsRx on insta and fb!